A refresher
for some manners to remember for the Holidays
Aunt Eliscia (from the film Gigi)
tells her niece "Bad table manners, my dear Gigi, have broken up more
households than infidelity."
Although this is not (specifically)
about table manners, I've been
thinking about some of my own graces that I need to brush up. Maybe you do too.
1) say Please.
I was reminded of this when visiting my hair-dresser and was asking if I
might please, have a piece of candy
from their candy jar. My hair dresser said "of course" and then went
on to tell me that no one ever asks.
Please is a graceful word, devoid of
entitlement.
2) Say Thank you
Expressing thanks to someone who does (even the smallest ) kindness, is
acknowledging their intersection in your life's path. Yes God -and the universe
does want the best for you, in your life's journey. Putting people in your life
to help you is part of the way that happens. Say Thank you, when it does.
3) Do not arrive at someone's home
(this holiday season) empty handed.
If you are visiting a friend-co-worker's- or acquaintance's
home, bring something
to thank them for their hospitality.
My personal favorite for this, is that I bake bread for them and bring it with
me to their home. Very few people refuse home- baked bread.
4) Acknowledge their decorations (if
they have them)
I don't care if their Christmas tree looks like the dog's breakfast, or
their decorations are chicken wire and toilet paper. If they're making an
effort, acknowledge it. Just like ALL dogs go to heaven-ALL Christmas trees are
beautiful-it's a rule. Offering "Oh, what a lovely tree" or noticing
a specific ornament will be meaningful to your host or hostess.
5) Be receptive to courtesy.
My reference point about this will appall most
of you. In the film Erin Brockavich, Erin tells her boss (after a meeting with
clients) to have a (bleeping) cup of coffee with these people. Have the cup of coffee, the glass of eggnog,
take a seat--sit deep--visit a (short) while. Being receptive to courtesy shows
that you are (essentially) not in a rush to get away from them.
6) Honor your commitments.
Don't blow someone off because you have a "better offer" and
expect your original friend or acquaintance to be "understanding". Talk about bad manners...geez.
