Weight-Loss Ritual

I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes in 1998. I know, that’s a long time ago.
It’s an, often losing, battle that is a daily struggle to get the “right numbers” on my fasting reading on my morning glucometer reading. Did I just sound like one of those commercials for Liberty Mutual?
Here’s what’s also been a struggle, all my life; my weight.
When I was diagnosed, I weighed 194. At 4’ 10” tall, I resembled one of those weebles (you know, they wobble, but they don’t fall down).
Over the years, I’ve tried all kinds of “diets”, but haven’t really been successful at losing all the weight I’ve wanted and needed to.
I have been successful at losing weight at a snails crawl and keeping it off.
So, in 2006, when I stepped on the scale at my Endocrinologists’ office, and the assistant weighing me said “184” (I never look, why torment myself) I was stunned.
A year later, when I was STILL that weight, I dared hope that maybe there were ways to work on this issue for myself.
I’ve had a trainer and friend who was a body builder, who, then, helped me to break the stigma (in my mind) of going to the gym (thank you, Doug). I learned that a lot of bodybuilders have had “self-image” problems, and any effort is better than no effort.
I learned that I have really good legs too.
I learned not to be afraid to “try” in a gym.
Back then, I started a ritual, which I had to put by the way-side when caring for my mother.
I needed a “reward” for myself in meeting some of my goals that was not “food based”. So, for each pound I lost, I put on one of my bracelets. I have a large collection of sterling and (some) gold bracelets that are the little chain types. You know the kind of bracelets, merino links, snake chains, facetted beads, etc.
But I had to take them off, because, I washed my hands so often, soap got caught in the links, so I constantly had a rash on my wrists.
Well, last Friday, I did it again. I weighed myself. The dial on my scale read 169.
Of course that was wrong…wasn’t it?
I recalibrated the scale, set it on the bathroom floor and weighed again…..169.
Another stunned moment.
It’s not everything I need to lose, but it’s a giant step from where I was.
I decided, in the light of this glowing news, to re-institute my ritual/reward system.
So Walt helped me to choose bracelets from among my collection, and divide them between my wrists.
I decided to “re-claim” the initial ten pounds I lost, because I did lose them, and I kept them off.
I know this isn’t the kind of story that is going to invite hoards of sponsors of weight-loss products and services with their ripe pens to sign me on as spokesperson. Who really finds it amazing to hear “I lost 24 pounds in 12 years!”
Actually, to answer that question….I do.
At first, the bracelets kind of bothered me on my right wrist.
But now they all just sort of feel like “part of me”.
As I look at them they remind me I’ve done something big for myself.
24 bracelets is quite a collection to have on one’s wrists.
They remind me that I can succeed at things that I consider futile.
They remind me that even if I never lose another pound, I did do this.
They remind me of my Gypsy soul.
They remind me of who I was and who I want to be.

Until next time:
Eat something wonderful
And live a life worth loving.

-Kim